Happy Discounted Candy Day!

Happy Discounted Candy Day, Everyone! Clearance goodies on February 15th are one of two reasons I don’t consider Valentine’s Day a waste, the second reason being that it helps our sluggish economy. I mean, people spend a lot of money on this “holiday” with presents and dinner. One of my coworkers full-heartedly expected either a diamond bracelet or an iPad, and she sounded so bratty about it. “He better have gotten me either the bracelet or the iPad, but we’ll se when I get home.” Sheesh. I’m a happily…no…extatically married woman, and I STILL think Valentine’s Day is lame. I love Mr. Prentice every day. We went out for authentic Chinese food (I tried spicy and numbing flavor for the first time) and ate chocolates my mommy sent us with free coffee from QT. It’s not fancy, but we had fun!

The building office management peeps sent our business a box of Dunkin Donuts Munchkins as a treat yesterday, so after I picked a blueberry one from the box, I sent this mass e-mail to let my coworkers know:

♥Through the sentimental gift of breakfast,
our building management wants to say,
have a Dunkin Donuts donut hole,
and a fabulous Valentine’s Day!♥

Last year,  I expressed my love for…umm…I guess my creativity and office sanity…definitely not my love of work or cleaning at work, the only way I know how. I wrote a sonnet from the fridge to the trash can. These star-crossed lovers only get to meet once a week, when I clean the fridge, and the fridge finally mustered the courage to express his fiery, undying love of the beautiful trash receptacle across the room. When I saw what Mr. Fridge wrote, I was moved to tears, so touched that I forwarded it to my coworkers. Joie was also inspired and sketched a quick pic to accompany the piece:

Break Room Love: A Sonnet from the Fridge to the Trash Can 

 

Such a cute couple!

Say I to you, my garbage pail so fair,
frigid and icy my innards may be,
my heart melts when thou comes and sits next to me,
whilst brushing my cheek with plastic bag hair.

 When Friday draws nigh, I sing with a prayer,
for the receptionist soon shall bring thee,
by my side, as she readies to clean me.
Her coworkers’ mess feeds our love affair.

 My soul, like the heat of a thousand stoves,
is an insatiable, passionate fire!

 Our flirtations afar give me obscene,
dreams of our rendezvous at five fifteen.

 I, The Fridge, love you with a thirst so dire,
no Friday cleaning shall slake my desire!

This is an example of one of my pieces that I was very proud of that none of my coworkers really seemed that impressed by. I put so much passion and work into this sonnet, but it’s usually the pop culture pieces and jokes, like the most famous Fridge Intruder Song, that get the praise and credit. Holy Crap! I’m poor, and I’m already a sellout. Lol.

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About purrrentice

Fantastic Voiceover? How About PRENTASTIC VOICEOVER?!?! I'm Prentice Osborne, a full-time, freelance voiceover talent out of Atlanta. My specialty is Millennial, teen and everything in between, and I work in multiple genres of VO, from e-learning to games to cartoons to radio and TV ads. I love the entire VO process, from pen to paper, mouth to mic, cursor to waveform. It's totally Prentabulous! Need some voice work? Bring it on, World! Freelance Prentice is here to blow your mind with laughs, creative magic, mad skills, and a little bit of razzle dazzle!
This entry was posted in blogging, chores, Discount candy, Dunkin Donuts, holidays, love, office, poetry, receptionist, refrigerator, Sellout, shenanigans, sonnet, Uncategorized, Valentine's Day, writing. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Happy Discounted Candy Day!

  1. Brooke says:

    Michael and I completely agree with you about Valentine’s being lame. We did enjoy a nice dinner at my mom’s on Sunday, but elected to order Chinese and stay in last night instead of dealing with the masses. As for the discounted candy, Target only has theirs marked to 30% off right now…

    • purrrentice says:

      Only 30%?!?! How Stingy! Candy wasn’t super cheap at Kroger, but OMG! There were mountains and mountains of Valentine’s Day baked goods on super clearance, from cakes to cookies to chocolate covered strawberries!

  2. joieart says:

    Wow it feels like I drew that a mere few months ago. It’s been a whole year? Wow.

    • purrrentice says:

      That was from back in the day when you were drawing sketches in secret at your office, taking a pic of them with your phone and texting them to me. Lol. Oh, how our operation has grown!

  3. Pingback: Tragic, Killer Robot – Zombie Love | Freelance Prentice

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