The Ten Dollar Poem

While looking for an image, I was thinking about how cool it would be to get paid to photograph money. Talk about easy money!

Happy Wednesday, Everybody. I know it’s been a while since I wrote a magnificent poem for this blog, but that’s changing today. I’ve been toying with this idea of my ten dollar poem for a while now. It started when I was compiling a list of the things I do at work and breaking down each job, defining how much per hour/year each job paid. Then I came across this article in Forbes: College Degree = $10-Hour Job. I laughed until I cried, or maybe I cried until I started cackling like a deranged weirdo.  Everybody knows I love to laugh, especially in the face of crazy times. My dad calls this “laughing to keep from crying.” Pinkie Pie calls it “Giggle at the Ghostie.”

Either way, I thought it would be fun to do my next archived poetic form with this theme of things I can buy for ten dollars. In the Receptionist on the Verge post, What’s your Sign? Well, I’m a Horny Fish, I wrote a poem in an interesting form. It is in ABAA, but the second stanza becomes the first, third and fourth of the next. And the last stanza sets the poem-up to begin in the same rhyming scheme. I have trouble believing I made this form-up, but I can’t find the name or description of this anywhere. So anyways, here is my ten dollar poem, in mystery format:

The Ten Dollar Poem

On certain days just like today,
my bank account looks quite malign,
and if this certain day is payday,
my sanity quickly floats away,

But rather than whine,
about how ten bucks an hour will pay my bills,
I make a game of guess and rhyme,
listing what is worth my time,

If I need a thrill,
after an hour of busting my ass,
I can buy a pack of my birth control pills,
or go on a shopping spree at Goodwill,

I could buy a gallon or two of gas,
or forty, rubber, bouncy balls,
or pay some kids to mow my grass,
or screw it! Just fill my wine glass!

For sixty minutes of taking calls,
I’ll get a student, matinee movie stub,
some cheap art to hang on my wall,
or a fuzzy blanket on which to sprawl,

I could eat a yummy, turkey sub,
or eat two and a half happy meals,
or buy half a lap dance at a club,
or drink one craft beer at the pub,

but what may be a better deal,
is instead to buy a cheap six-pack,
and pizza rolls! That’d be ideal,
to deal with any angst I feel,

I could download a game or six music tracks,
or buy some kibble for my cat,
nail polish, a coffee, or a trading card stack,
some flip flops, socks, or 396 Tic Tacs,

So instead of being a brat,
when feeling underpaid and cast astray,
I’ll make this joke and not fall flat,
because someday my time will buy more than that.

About purrrentice

Fantastic Voiceover? How About PRENTASTIC VOICEOVER?!?! I'm Prentice Osborne, a full-time, freelance voiceover talent out of Atlanta. My specialty is Millennial, teen and everything in between, and I work in multiple genres of VO, from e-learning to games to cartoons to radio and TV ads. I love the entire VO process, from pen to paper, mouth to mic, cursor to waveform. It's totally Prentabulous! Need some voice work? Bring it on, World! Freelance Prentice is here to blow your mind with laughs, creative magic, mad skills, and a little bit of razzle dazzle!
This entry was posted in My Little Pony, Mystery, Need New Job, Pinkie Pie, poetry, receptionist, writing and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to The Ten Dollar Poem

  1. I always buy half a lap dance at strip clubs. I also tend to tip the dancers with quarters. I like when their g-strings jingle. 🙂

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