Every time I visit my blog, I see the posts that have been viewed the most in the past week. Then I found that I could dig and find the top blogs of all time! Curiosity finally overwhelmed me, and I decided to see which posts had the most hits. Then I read them.

Here Are My Top 5 Blog Post of All Time

5. I Feel Like Derpy Hooves Today (239 Hits)
Ahh. I remember this day. This was when my boss cancelled my departments coffee breaks even though she takes smoke breaks almost every hour. I cried all the way home and had a “What the f@$k did I do wrong with my life” episode. I’m still trying to lose the weight from those four months of torture!

4. 10 Things to Know About Being a Receptionist (434 hits)
This is one of my favorites, and I’m shocked it’s not higher-up. It does have the most comments of all my blogs though. After receiving an advertizement for a receptionist workshop, I went bonkers, and I wrote the “real” top ten things any receptionist should know/learn.

Poor Joie. This quickie sketch she did for me in ten seconds is the top fridge illustration seen.

3. Milestones and Going on Vacation (590 hits)
In this post, I gloat about going to Disney World and display a fridge song to the tune of Wish Upon a Star. Then I share some writing milestones and announce that I will be voicing Rarity on My Little Pony Friendship is Magic Abridged.

2. Attitudes and Strange Dreams (765 hits)
After watching too much Know Your Meme before bed, I had a super weird dream. Ooh! That rhymed! I describe it and then rant about my bosses trolling my replacement during one day I took off to do a promotion…oops…I mean…I was at the doctor or on vacation or something.

1. Honest Concrete Makeover (831 hits!)
This was the day I learned that my crazy, racist, mean bully of a boss quit. Despite that great news, the day was super busy and bad , but I did write a fridge poem, a visual form known as concrete poetry.

It’s no surprise to me that Receptionist on the Verge dominates all my top blogs. Freelance Prentice posts don’t even make the top ten, with Dragon* Con Virgin No More (103 hits) being #11. At first I believed people enjoyed Receptionist on the Verge more because of my office horror stories and ranting. I can’t really emulate those anymore, so if that was the case, I’d be out of luck. But just before I made a heavy sigh in blogging defeat, I saw my top search terms:

• Concrete Poem
• Rarity
• Pinkie Pie
• Concrete Poetry
• Creepy

So…concrete poetry, ponies and creepy memes made these posts popular? Interesting…

I realized I miss the fridge poems, but it would be pointless to start writing them again. Instead I plan to highlight an old fridge poem each week and then rewrite the poetic form in a more relevant context! Pretty cool, huh? More Prentice Poems?! It’s your lucky day!

To start this-off right, I want to test a theory I have, based on my top posts and search terms… Concrete Poem + Ponies = Broken Internet!?

Pinkie Pie Concrete Poem

My mind is an enigma,
to others and myself,
I’m a fluffy ball of sunshine,
with surprising social stealth.

I’m off the wall,
off the cuff.
Don’t call my bluff!
I’m no cream puff!

But I think they’re yummy!
Yes indeedee.
I’ll never judge you,
so don’t judge me!

People think I’m a teenage girl,
when I’m actually in my twenties.
It’s not like I try, but I know why!
The reasons are a plenty.

I have a baby face,
I’m peppy, cute and fun.
I love games and silly nicknames,
and silly jokes and puns.

I also love to party,
and rarely will decline.
Who on Earth would rather work,
than have a glass of wine?

And please don’t get me started,
on stuffy, mean, old folks!
When they try to understand me,
they only get a stroke!

What some adults call immature,
I call “youthful” and “lighthearted,”
and things that I find awesome,
they often find retarded.

Too often my thoughts and ideas,
are flat-out disrespected,
or sometimes just misunderstood,
but either way rejected.

So screw the prudes,
the boring Betties,
those negative Nellies,
those yuppie yetis.

Whilst they try too hard,
and feel awry,
I’ll be random,
crazy,
weird,
and glad,
because I’m a Pinkie Pie!